Welcome to pat's Place

The Cover

 

Welcome to my site. Well, here we go again. It has been 25 years since I burst onto the internet when it was relatively new. I have shared stories and adventures over the year, and I finally set down and wrote THE ETSU Memoirs: Volume 1. 

Check it out. 


I hope you get a chance to look over all the stories, over 260 in all.

Check out James and Pat on Youtube

 

Well, here is a little saga that happened last year. I'll call it the Bitch Saga. Read here and you will find out why. ANNE

Well, this is my site. It is a combination of my life, and the fun I have, and have had. I live in Campbell County, Tennessee. Home of Volunteer football, beautiful ladies, and beautiful mountains. 

As you will learn if you don't know me, you will either love me, or hate me, but you can't forget me. 

You can check me out on Facebok . Also follow me on Twitter

Ask me abou the Lesbian couple who offered to purchase my sperm.

Well New years 2009 was spectacular. A short list of what happened:

Gun powder on the ceiling.
Light Fixture Broke (Thanks Heather, she's deceptively strong)
Deck caught on fire.
Broken Chair.
This was a spectacular New Years with new faces and friends joining us.

Airing of grievances

The airing of the grievances In the spirit of the Festivus season this year I have decided to celebrate the world?s most famous fictional holiday. If you have not scene the Festivus episode of Seinfeld please do, it is my second favorite holiday episode ever (behind the Venture Brother?s Christmas special, in which we meet Anne McGhee?s holiday alter ego the Krampus) For those of you in the know Festivus cannot end without the airing of the grievances so here we go. Shall we start with one of my favorite topics, douchebags and douchebaggery? I don?t know what else I can write about them. They are all closet homos who behave in a hyper masculine way as a means of covering up the homosexuality. Either come out or end your miserable existence please. Controlling boyfriends/girlfriends. This is almost a subcategory of douchebaggery but you can be a controller without being a douche so they get a separate entry. Honestly do you need to control every little thing your significant other does? If so you need help and are probably on your way to becoming an abuser, if you are not already. This is almost my new douchebaggery. In the latter part of this year I refriended a delightful young lady whose exboyfriend actually made her block me on myspace. I almost lost an amazing friend because somebody apparently has issues with the size of their penis (that is my theory and I am sticking to it). People do not let anybody tell you what to do and who to be friends with that is just sad. The state of education. It pains me how many stupid kids we have out there. They can?t spell. They can?t form intelligent thought. They are at a huge disadvantage. I blame the standardized test driven public education system. Teachers spend so much time getting kids ready for whatever test they use these days they don?t focus on things like phonics and critical thinking skills. The public education system turns out students that are basically zombies. Something has to change there. While we are on the subject of education shall we touch on my second favorite blog topic, Anne McGhee? She reached a new low this year when she cancelled a benefit show the night if the performance and went home, leaving the students to tell the rapidly gathering crowd that the show was cancelled. She needs to be retired, she was teaching when my father student taught and he was in his 35th year of teaching when he decided to make his unfortunate career change, that was three years ago. I am pretty sure she stays to feed off the souls of freshmen to maintain her life. It is like Jennifer?s Body without the benefit of Megan Fox. People who have terrible parenting skills but insist on shitting out kid after kid. I have worked with the public and have seen the worst of the worst. There is never ever an excuse to bring your child into a public place with a diaper that is so full of excrement that it is bleeding through their pants and stinking up the room. It is also unacceptable to bring your loud obvious crack babies to the movies and have them interfere with my enjoyment of a flick. At what point do you think, ?Hmmm I bet my 18 month old will love the hell out of Avatar!? HIRE A SITTER! Or better yet just do not reproduce. People who use meth. It is made with household cleaning products. It WILL kill you in 5 to 7 years. Normally I am all for adding chlorine to the gene pool and would say let them do it. Unfortunately in the meanwhile I have to look at their awful deteriorating bodies and terrible meth teeth. If you really want to kill yourself there are far more efficient ways. While we are on the topic let is discuss people who use the excuse, ?There is nothing to do here that is why I use drugs.? Worst. Excuse. Ever. I could write an entire blog on things that are better to do than using drugs when you are bored (in fact that may be my next one). People who bitch about, ?Them Yankees that come down here and use our lake.? They are the basis of our economy people. We would have much less here without Norris Lake and the tourism it brings. Also I bet a lot of the people who make this complaint love to go to Ohio to deer hunt. Finally I will have to do this one. People who promise you things and do not do them. I do a lot of stuff for a lot of folks. I do not ask for much in return. Sadly that is still too much for some people. If you can?t or won?t do something for me after I have done something for you and taken my time that I could have spent on doing something for myself and my own personal enjoyment even though you promised me you would then I do not even know what to say to you. I hope you enjoyed my little Festivus rant folks. I encourage you all to write one of your own, even if you do not publish it. Either way it is great therapy.